Who Me?

Lately, a lot of readers have been commenting and emailing me asking me if my daughter behaves perfectly all the time because it looks that way from the pictures and if so what is my secret?

I am here to say yes my daughter is perfect and never throws temper tantrums.


Ok, she is perfect but she throws temper tantrums all the time. Yesterday, she kept crying and screaming no so mcuh that I when I saw my pediatrician on the street I asked her if my daughter was ok. Surely there must be a reason for why my daughter is being so difficult? Turns out she is just a normal toddler.

I started my blog as a way to celebrate my daughter. Postpartum Depression made it difficult to bond with her and my vision was clouded by what a baby should be as opposed to who my baby is and was. Once I started blogging I took pictures every day of Princess A. When she was finally in bed I would look at the pictures and her personality would become clear to me.

She is not the pristine baby girl that the stork delivers in the movies. She is Princess A. She wears a crown and loves tutus but also loves playing in the mud. She is the baby that couldn’t co-sleep but the second we put her in her crib slept soundly. She gave up the pacifier at 3 months and the bottle at 9 months on her own. She is nice to everyone unless they are mean to her puppy Freckles. If you cross her puppy she will push you and not even feel guilty about it. Princess A has never once touched the beautiful dolls I bought her but today she bottle fed a Tapir and T-Rex and then threw her doll out of it’s crib so she could put her dinosaurs and jungle animals to sleep in it. She’s not the perfect stereotypical baby girl she’s something better. She’s Princess A.

She’s also the kid who loves to play so much that when she realizes she has pooped climbs up to the highest point in the playground because she doesn’t want her play time to be interrupted by a diaper change. Once she is there she cries because she realizes it’s not very fun to sit in poop. So I climb up to retrieve her and she cries even louder because she has changed her mind… who cares about a dirty diaper when they are slides? I drag her to the bathroom where she decides once again that poopy diapers are gross and she wants to take hers off now by herself who cares if mom isn’t ready yet I’m a big girl and don’t need anyone’s help. Uh-oh she is covered in poop now she starts to cry because she is covered in it and is unhappy BUT DOESN’T WANT ANYONE TO HELP CLEAN THE POOP OFF HER BECAUSE WHY CAN’T PEOPLE JUST LEAVE HER ALONE TO WALLOW IN HER OWN EXCREMENT SHE’S A BIG GIRL AND IF SHE WANTS TO SIT IN POOP ALL DAY SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO SO SHE THROWS HERSELF ON THE FLOOR OF A NASTY NYC PUBLIC BATHROOM AND I HAVE TO CARRY HER TO OUR STROLLER AND IN THE PROCESS GET POOP ON MYSELF. I LEAVE THE PLAYGROUND COVERED IN POOP, PUSHING A CRYING CHILD, AND WITH LITTLE SANITY OR DIGNITY.

So then I go home. I give Princess A lunch and put her down for her nap. I wash myself off and decided to look at my camera. Yes, she was really annoying at the end but I got some great pictures of her before the outburst. Then I realize that I got some hysterical pictures of her when she was trying to pretend everything was normal and she hadn’t pooped. These pictures crack me up and I am now able to see that Princess A isn’t some maniacal monster out to drive me bonkers. She’s a kid with a lot of moxie who really wants to be able to do everything her way and on her own… even if that means getting covered in her own poop. She’s not a bad kid who throws temper tantrums all day… she’s a kid just trying to play at the playground whose awesome play session got cut short by an unplanned poop.

So then I blog about our day. But once I start writing “Princess A’s Outfit of the Day” the frustration is gone and all I see is my daughter who won’t let anything get in her way. I admire this and lovingly write my blog post forgetting about the not so fun parts. I don’t do this to be disingenuous is just happens.

So if you read my blog and are wondering how I have such a well behaved daughter just remember that I don’t. I love her to pieces but she throws at least one temper tantrum a day and if she doesn’t throw poop at me I somehow get the dog’s poop on me. And if you still want to take some parenting tips from me because you think my daughter is perfect the only advice I can say is to try and take a picture of your kid every day for a month and see what you learn about them. You might learn that while your kid is far from perfect they might be something that is way better… themselves.

Stay Glamorous,

Shannon Sutherland

Janitor at Mom Blog

Lover of Funny at The World New York Comedy Club

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16 Responses to “MY PERFECT DAUGHTER”

  1. Melissa October 2, 2012 at 4:16 PM #

    As a parent you learn to love poop. It’s normal, it’s natural, it’s how you tell there’s something wrong. Baby poops 3 times a day and then doesn’t poop? Something is wrong. Baby poops 3 times a day and now poops 90 times in an hour? Something’s wrong. I was shocked to learn how much I loved poop. Once the nightmare of potty training is over (and it will be a nightmare), poop is not as loveable. Poop in the bathtub, poop in the undies, poop in the house plants (yes this happens far too often).

    Princess A is fiesty. You can tell by looking. She has the look of a child that wants to know everything NOW. I would never ask a parent if their child was well behaved, because that is a sure fire trigger for a melt-down of epic proportions over the inavailabilty of unicorns and dragons!

    • Shannon October 2, 2012 at 9:19 PM #

      LOL…. whenever I say princess A does something (and I won’t say what out of fear) then she stops doing it the second I talk about it.

  2. Missy October 2, 2012 at 4:17 PM #

    Love this at this moment Josh has thrown his sisters barbie out of the doll stroller and is happily pushing his Chuck the truck in the stroller.The very minute I needed to leave the house last night to take my hubby to go hunting he was covered from head to toe in dirt but I went with it and just let him play in it and took him dirty.The bathtub washed away the dirt and I had a happy kid.

    • Shannon October 2, 2012 at 9:18 PM #

      Sounds like fun. Princess A loves dirt as well!

  3. Melody October 2, 2012 at 4:21 PM #

    She’s adorable! Isn’t great to have a daughter that’s determined and fearless? Ok, that sounded a little conceited but that’s how I feel about my little one. She’s a tough cookie but also a sweetie lol.

    • Shannon October 2, 2012 at 9:17 PM #

      It is awesome faving a determined daughter BUT it can get tiring.

    • Shannon October 2, 2012 at 9:17 PM #

      It is awesome faving a determined daughter BUT it can get tiring.

      • Melody October 3, 2012 at 2:56 PM #

        yes it can lol.

  4. snarkysarcasticbish October 2, 2012 at 7:10 PM #

    I love this Shannon. Great job, this just describes it perfectly. Awesome job, yea my daughter dear god in heaven, I still scream sometimes, lol but I love her to pieces. She’s def a drama queen princess. I love it.

    • Shannon October 2, 2012 at 9:17 PM #

      Mine is a drama queen as well!

  5. Gemma (@BlueGemma) October 3, 2012 at 7:52 AM #

    I love reading your stories Shannon! Your photos are priceless and I love that you share everything…not just the unicorns and cotton candy type of day, but also the poop days too….I miss having a toddler…. I’m not sure why but my daughter Sophia very rarely threw a full blown temper tantrum. She is 13 now and gets mortified if we happen to be out in a store or restaurant and there’s a little one screaming and yelling because they want something they don’t have….she recently asked me if she did that when she was little and I had to say “no”…. I think part of the key is being consistent as a parent….or maybe not…. I always like to think that my parenting skills had something to do with my kid who never had a full blown temper tantrum, but, I know in reality it was really just Sophia’s personality. She is very mellow….even now. She’s not a drama queen, but, loves being the princess. I was a little sad this week when she asked me if she was still allowed to go trick or treating at 13…..after all, she is taller than me now. : ( I miss my little little girl, but, I love my big girl who is growing up before my eyes. And, yes….we will be going trick or treating this year….at least one more time!
    Have a fun day Shannon! Please keep writing….I enjoy it so much!

    • Shannon October 3, 2012 at 8:03 AM #

      Awwww Gemma. Thanks! Every kid is so different and I love it. My godson is so much more calm than Amelia. You could see each of their distinct personalities from day one. But I bet the fact that your daughter doesn’t through temper tantrums has something to do with you 🙂

  6. Karen Nigh-Dent October 3, 2012 at 10:29 AM #

    Princess A reminds me a lot of Katie. Must be those March babies! Very independent, strong personality, but so loving at the same time. My Katie has never liked dolls, but give her an animal or real baby to play with and she is thrilled.
    As for poop. It amazes me how much of my life began to revolve around poop. It was one of the main topics of conversation when my kid were little. My favourite was when David was a newborn and Matt was ready for work. He decided to help me out and change David before I fed him. He lifted David’s legs to put the clean diaper under him, and David let it fly. Matt was covered and all I could do was laugh. Matt had to take another shower!

    • Shannon October 3, 2012 at 12:47 PM #

      Hahahhahahahaaaa it’s all about the poop. That’s why my blog has the name it does.

  7. clochette191 October 3, 2012 at 5:01 PM #

    I love to read it : it’s so funny ! My daughters are not perfect : they have the different personnality ! Cassie is calm but Lily is daredevil. Even if it makes me tired, i love them ! It’s normal : they inherited to me lol
    Princess A is so cute and a kiss or a hug from princess A makes you forget everything ! children are real magician.

    • Shannon October 3, 2012 at 6:35 PM #

      Very magical! All princess A has to do is smile and I forget everything!

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