BEWARE: This is a really gross post so only read it if you can handle it and haven’t just eaten. I am posting this just in case there are any struggling mom’s out there who are tired of dealing with disgusting things and letting them know they are not alone.
One day when Princess A was 3 weeks old I was walking her during her daily 3 hour cry for no reason party. I had finally got her to sleep so I knew all I had to do was keep walking smoothly to keep her quiet. Then I looked down at Freckles and he had a white string hanging out of his mouth. As I was still walking I checked it out and pulled his lips up and what I realized was truly horrible. He had a tampon in his mouth. Not just a tampon a used tampon. And not just a used tampon but a really big and bloody used tampon.
I started to freak out and cry in disgust. I tried everything to get it out and then I just gave up and kept on walking because I didn’t want to deal with the tampon or wake up Princess A. Many people stopped me on the street and told me my dog had a tampon in his mouth but I just ignored them and kept on walking. Then a nice guy offered to help. He said he would offer my dog some of his chicken sandwich and see if he would drop the tampon. I said no thank you because Freckles is allergic to chicken and I didn’t want to deal with the diarrhea later. Then I noticed the guy had a banana and asked if we could use the banana as a treat because Freckles LOVES bananas. He looked at me like I was a weirdo and then said sure.
He gave Freckles’ half of his banana and of course he dropped the tampon. He then gobbled up the banana so fast that before we could kick the tampon away he swallowed it whole.
The nice guy was so grossed out he just walked away. Then I freaked out and called my vet because Freckles has a very sensitive stomach. While I was on the phone I stopped walking so Princess A woke up and started crying. The vet said Freckles would be fine but I should check his poop and look for the tampon. Seriously, could this get any worse?!?!?!?!?!?! If the tampon didn’t make it to his poop that meant he had a blockage and they would have to do something… I didn’t pay attention to what because I was too busy trying not to puke and pee at the same time out of pure demoralization.
I walked home with a crying baby and a dog who couldn’t stop grinning because he was so happy that he got to eat the banana and the tampon. I honestly don’t know what I did next. I probably cried and wished my life wasn’t filled with poop, pee, puke, and tampons. But now things have gotten better not perfect but better and sometimes my family is wacky and gross but I wouldn’t have it any other way… except maybe how horrifying it was when I finally found the tampon in his poop. I will need therapy to get that image out of my head!